Heavenly Jape!

God returns to Heaven from his Summer holidays, he finds the place in an absolute shambles. The Pearly Gates are gone, house's of ill repute, dog and horse racing tracks, casino's, and porn studio's are being built all over Heaven. Demon's are buggering his Angel's left, right, and centre, and untold numbers of saved Soul's are being tempt into sinning again.

Satan has taken up residence in Heaven, and God finds him playing a high stakes poker game with the Arch Angel Gabriel, Gabriel is losing big time but beleives his luck will change. God walks up to them and say's to Satan "Whats the crack then? Why are you here? And what the hell is happening here?"

Satan turns to address God, whilst doing so a mortgage document appears out of nowhere. Satan say's "It like this Old Boy! Heavenly repossesion due to non-payment of Heavenly mortgage. Its a foreclosure, Old Boy!"

God grabs the document and gets a firm hold of Satan by the throat saying "You can shove this where the sun never shines, also you can put Heaven back the way it was prior to your arrival. If you dont! I promise you that there will be hell to pay, get my drift? When I'm satisfied that you have done that, you can fuck off back to hell, where you came from!"

In due course, Heaven is returned to its peaceful normality. No trace is visible anywhere of what has happened, a few less saved Souls, a few sore Angel's. The Pearly Gates are back in place, and as God watches Satan walk sheepishly out of them he has a sudden thought.

God shout's after Satan "Hang on a moment, you can take that TWAT Beadle with you too. I'll give him YOU BETTER WATCH OUT! BEADLE'S ABOUT!"